Small Things With Great Meaning
A shell that holds my soap in the shower
An orange vase on my bathroom windowsill
A green beer bottle with the face of Buddha holding dried yellow flowers
Green army men doing yoga
A small handmade white angel
A small painting of the view from my childhood home
A Boston Strong Sign
A small painting of the ocean that six other people also have — each just slightly different
A green paperweight in the shape of a heart
A book about letters left at my door
Cardboard cutouts of Kenny Chesney and Homer Simpson
An Asian jewelry box
A Wonder Woman figurine
A coffee cup with a resemblance of my dog
A Dashboard Bobble Head Jesus
A sticky note left on my car window and on a photo in my house
A day-by-day inspirational calendar left at my door each December
Socks with images of my dog
A bowl overflowing with cards
A t-shirt saying You Are My Sunshine
What do all these small objects have in common? They are all small objects of great meaning to me. These small objects are not expensive and yet they are priceless treasures. These small objects were given to me by people who saw them and thought of me, people who know and love me, as acts of love and friendship. They are small but ripe with meaning. Every time I see them I think of the person who gave them to me, of how much that person means to me, of how well that person knows me, and of how loved I am despite my humanness. These small objects tell the story of my life. They are daily reminders that relationships that matter.
My husband and I are different in many aspects but in one very particular way. He can tolerate dirt but not clutter. I can’t tolerate dirt, but man do I love clutter. Anyone who knows me and has seen my car, my office or bathroom (both show above) knows this and has great sympathy for my husband. I’ve been this way my entire life — a keeper of “things”. Small objects have always been meaningful to me. I hold onto them as if they are the person who gave them to me. I thought about what that says about me.
Our belongings are part of our extended self and are visual confirmation of the strength of our relationships. These objects are imbued with our essence and the essence of the gift giver. I don’t think I’m alone in believing that the best gifts are the ones that are most on target for the receiver. They are tangible evidence that the gift giver loves the recipient and that love is grounded in understanding of the recipient. The giver is interested in the recipient and that is the key to deep friendship, not being interesting but being interested. Friendships survive because we choose each other and we choose to do things for each other. Friendships continue when we are living up to each other’s expectations. Friends have a mutual understanding of each other’s human limitations. Friendship is a relationship with no strings attached except the ones you choose to tie, one that’s just about being there, being interested, as best as you can. The best you can do in each moment is always changing. The gift of friendships is that we accept each other in the moments and acknowledge this reality in each other. The gift we give each other is grace for our friends and for ourselves.
